Daryl Patrice and Alex Alvarez in "Everything That Happened Before That Terrible Holiday Sweater Party."
Surprise! Surprise! For the umpdeedumpth year City Theatre is back on the Susan Westfall Playwrights (sic) Stage, in the Carnival Studio Theater at the Ziff Ballet Opera House at the Adrienne Arsht Center, with its 2018 version of Winter Shorts.
Festive lights sparkle on the Christmas presents and candy canes left and right down stage on Jody Dellaventura's welcoming set. Matt Corey's music evokes the holidays and Eric Nelson's lights bathe all in a soft glow. Ellis Tillman's vivid and imaginative costumes soon appear, with interns quickly moving furniture on and off stage. Production values are high. So are our hopes.
Dave Corey and Alex Alvarez in 'O Tannebaum'
Lights up and Steven Hayet's “Talking Points” brings us an ensemble piece. A dining room table seating family members Daryl Patrice, Alex Alvarez, Dave Corey, Irene Adjan and Diane Garle. Standing, reading a prepared speech is Jovon Jacobs. He's breaking up with his current honey and will take no questions. Except from his Granny, the exquisite Irene Adjan. A tender, funny tale, setting the tone for the evening.
I'm lying. “Talking Points”, directed by Gladys Ramirez, is the exception for what follows are six fade to black TV sketches.
"Talking Points" by Steven Hayet
SNL anyone?
“Hapless Disciples” by Jessica Farr has two angels, complete with halos. And cigarettes. They're waiting to go on in a Christmas Pageant and they're lounging, dissing. Diana Garle and Daryl Patrice are the hapless pair. The writing is slick, endless smart ass, with quite funny references to life today. And then it just drifts to a close, but not before dropping “I just shaved my legs” and “I had my first orgasm at five”. The piece was not helped by the lack of diction and clarity. Directed by Margaret M. Ledford.
Mark Harvey Levine's “Oh, Tannenbaum” features Corey as a beautifully bedecked Christmas tree and Alvarez as his Jewish owner. The tree wants to return to the forest. Perhaps to escape the old jokes. Directed by Gladys Ramirez.
“Fulfillment Center” is a lengthy piece with Jacobs trying to convince Adjan of the joys of wrapping and shipping parcels. Ho hum. Written by Jeanette D. Farr and directed by Margaret M. Ledford.
Writer Steve Yockey puts the crude in Christmas with his “Everything That Happened Before that Terrible Holiday Sweater Party” with Alvarez and Patrice fighting about ugly Christmas sweaters, awkward choristers and the topper: male sex with Christmas fruit cakes. Directed by Margaret M. Ledford.
Jovon Jacobs and Irene Adjan in "Fulfillment Center"
“Mama's Eggnog” by Angela Stern has a funny concept: mix Mama's ashes into the eggnog cinnamon, sprinkle and drink. Alvarez, Adjan and Garle do the best they can with a piece notable only for its screaming arguments and foul language. Directed by Andy Quiroga.
Traditionally City Theatre closes its programs with an all ensemble laugher. Not this year. Mark Harvey Levine's “A Very Special Hanukkah Special” wonders what would happen if Hannukah was substituted for Christmas. Not much, apparently. Directed by Margaret M. Ledford.
There's a short play axiom that says if you don't like this one, just wait for the next. Not this year, I'm afraid.
City Theatre's “Winter Shorts” is running through December 23 at the Arsht Center, 1300 Biscayne Boulevard, Miami. 305-949-6722 www.arshtcenter.org
